Real Men, Real Dads » Random Thoughts » Real Dads Don’t Leave
Real Dads Don’t Leave
To say I get annoyed at discussions about deadbeat dads and fathers abandoning their children is an understatement. I get an equal amount of annoyance from those that beat a dead horse about deadbeat dads as I do those that defend a deadbeat father. When you look closely at the each player in these discussions, it is easy to identify the biases as well as where those biases are rooted. A lot of females in these discussions tend to lean toward the “most dads are deadbeats” boundary, while men tend to toe the other line… the line where moms take all of dads money through child support and turn him into a deadbeat against his will.
Looking at the topic objectively, however, one will find the topic a little more middle of the road than others might have them believe. True, there are plenty of dads out there who do not take their responsibilities seriously and choose instead to be children themselves. However, there are plenty of men trying to do the right thing for their children. Some of them are put in poor circumstance due to divorce and child support. Those men are maligned simply because they do not have custody of their children.
A U.S. Census Bureau report puts some of the misinformation about deadbeat dads into focus. 25% of custodial mothers do not receive child support because the father simply can not pay. Of the remaining 75% of custodial mothers, the majority receive appropriate child support and/or do not have a deadbeat dad involved. In fact, of over ten million custodial mothers, only 7% (one in fourteen) have problems with a true deadbeat dad who has the means to pay child support but refuses the responsibility to help care for his children.
I agree that the 7% previously mentioned who are deadbeat fathers should be held accountable, but I sincerely hope that the next time you hear someone bashing dads, fathers, and men in general concerning their avoidance of duties, you’ll remember this blog post on Real Men, Real Dads. Before a problem can be fixed, people need to understand how bad the problem truly is without exaggeration.
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Written by admin
I have experienced a wide range of emotions, events, hobbies, and jobs over my 30 years of life. My favorite is being a husband and a father, but right behind that are being a soldier, ring announcing for pro wrestling, rapping, interrogating, blogging, and background investigating. I own and operate Real Men, Real Dads (www.realmenrealdads.com). I look forward to working with new people on exciting projects!
Filed under: Random Thoughts · Tags: child support, custody, deadbeat dad, father, parents, real dads, real fathers, Real men
3 Responses to "Real Dads Don’t Leave"
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I agree, the term “deadbat dad” irritates me. I’m not that guy. But we can’t ignore that deadbeat dads do exist — probably in large numbers. We need to send the message that all dads need to step up to the plate and be responsible.
You’re right. Deadbeat dads do, in fact, exist… but i think there has been a stigma placed on dads in general and that term is used entirely too liberally.
Quick question…of the 7% of deadbeat Dads, is there any stats on why they have chosen/been forced to a dead beat route????
I have personally witnessed the horendous games MOMS play with fathers!! It is cruel and also understandable that a man and a father can be beaten into a state of giving up!! I believe a study of circumstance would most likely lower the 7 percent!! Is there ever a time a man should walk away from a child?? Perhaps when it is more damaging than beneficial and perhaps since he too should be allowed to move forward with a new relationship as MOMS do!!! Perhaps when the situation of sustaining a relationship of your child from a previous relationship is damaging to a whole outer cell of children and people, then men SACRIFICE their love for one child to spare the corruption of many!! I have witnessed the tears and terror that some men have had to endure and witnessed the pain of their current families at the hands of MOM’s GAMES!!! Havent heard a cruel label tagged on those moms but know their percent would likely be greater than 7%!!
I applaud all the dads who manage sanity and relationships with their children despite the hardships ruthless mothers bestow upon them!! Dads are human beings too!!! No man is immune to the pains involved in losing their fulltime relationships with their children through divorce!!!
So I say MOMS treat the fathers like human beings so your children can reap the benefits!!!